"Awake"

I lay here tormented every night
Tossing and turning waiting for sleep
But it never comes

Wrapped up in thoughts of you that bind my heart
Their thorned vines piercing through
Tearing me apart

Waves of pleasure amid the pain
Erotic dreams and nightmares play
Upon my mind like broken records- or broken dreams

Was I wrong to speak the truth
To expose myself through my deepest desires
Was I crazy to believe everything
My heart pleaded to me was real?

My eyes close as I twist around
To try and sleep again
But all I can see are visions
That I cannot make go away

A look in your eyes and feelings I cannot hide
Take me from this place and show me your world
Throw me up against the wall
You've heard me cry- now answer my call
Kiss me deep and breathe inside me
Send chills through me and make me scream
Make love to me like you have none before
Reach within and touch my soul
Set me free upon your waves-
And I will dance for you alone

But I am only left with tears in my eyes
As they open again - never asleep but never truly awake
For this is nothing more but one of my wild fantasies
A broken dream left hanging in the wind

Still I cry out to you
But you choose not to hear
To walk away on your own path- alone
Never to wonder who this shadow of a memory truly was or is

And so I try day by day
To force my feelings to go away
To no longer torture myself through the night
With thoughts of you branded upon my mind

But no matter what I do or how hard I try
Still I lie awake in the night
Tossing and turning through tears and scorn
Through dreamt up romance and wild fantasies
Amid my aching heart and throbbing head

I lie here still, awake